The Dentist

I went to the dentist today. For a long time, I didn’t go to the dentist at all; my mother always made sure I got my semi-annual checkups growing up, but once I was old enough to make my own medical decisions, I stopped going and didn’t start again until I moved a couple years ago, had a kid, and started reading stories about how poor oral health could lead to problems in other areas down the road. I didn’t feel like developing heart disease someday because I didn’t care for my teeth properly. That’s what I eat fast food for.

So today was my third visit to this particular dentist, and while it’s different from what I’m used to (ex: my old dentist came by to take a look at my teeth every time I had an appointment; I’ve seen my current dentist once, I think, on my first visit), I enjoy it. I see the same hygienist every time, which is nice. We’re working on developing our routine; so far it consists of small talk, administrative stuff (choosing a new toothbrush, making the next appointment), cleaning (when she will invariably tell me I need to floss), and wrap-up (a little more small talk, then the part where I always forget if I owe a co-pay or if my insurance covers the entire visit).

Growing up, I sucked at brushing my teeth regularly - I mean, I’d do it at least once a day, but usually not more than that – and both the dentist and hygienist would always call me on it. “You’ve got really nice teeth,” the doc would say. “You need to take care of them.” It’s a refrain I became familiar with, and while it wasn’t the only reason I stopped going on a regular basis (that awful pick that they use to scrape your teeth was the worst; yes, I know that if I brushed like I was supposed to, they wouldn’t need the pick. But you know they’d use it anyway!), it certainly didn’t help. Nobody wants to hear about how bad they suck at something.

So anyway, my hygienist was finishing up today, telling me I need to brush closer to the gum line and floss, when she drops this line on me:

“You need to take care of your teeth. I can tell someone spent a lot of money to make them look nice.”

Now, this threw me for a loop. First part, same old, same old. Second part? I’ve never had any work done on my teeth, just regular cleanings, and I told her so.

“You’ve never had ortho?” she asked. I’m not sure she believed me.

“No, I never had braces.” By this point, I wasn’t sure myself. (Did I have braces and nobody told me?)

We left it at that, and I went out to the front desk to give the lady there a hard time (all in good fun, of course), but the exchange got me thinking. Everyone has something they’re good at, right? Or, to put it more broadly, everyone has something “going” for them. What if that thing, for me, is that MY TEETH ARE STRAIGHT? What does that even mean? How is that a marketable skill? Should I be a competitive eater? Have my own show? Does the “Man vs. Food” guy need to watch out? I just don’t know.